


Your eyes, hands and body heat

by b3ta0



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Drama, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Love, M/M, Romance, Shameless Smut, Slice of Life, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-08-02
Packaged: 2018-02-11 01:39:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2048388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/b3ta0/pseuds/b3ta0
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He felt those familiar pair of eyes starring down at him, fingers lingering across his skin, but he just couldn't answer the same question repeating in his head. "Who do they belong to?" . The moment he felt like he was getting close, they were gone. </p><p>But one day, he seemed to have came cross the very same pair of eyes, hands and body heat. But are they the ones he have always been looking for?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

The moment he stepped into the world of light, the first thing he saw was a pair of metallic grey eyes that set themselves upon him, gently soothing the crying child.

He was always captivated by the pair of grey eyes looking down at him, as if sworn to protect him from anything considered a threat, or harm.

He was starting to have his own little thoughts and responding to what they call him, "Eren". He laid his eyes on a soft-spoken woman, cuddling him. Along her side was a man with a tall build. What they called 'dad'. However, the only thing that his little fingers would always hold on to - as if clinging onto a dear life - were a pair of cold hands, fingers that were lean and long.

He was by far a smart child for his age. He learned how to watch people, observing them. The first word he learned was neither 'mum; nor 'dad' but it was 'brother'. Unable to pronounce his brother's name, he would still give soft calls and whispers. In front of him, the arms of three opened to welcome his ability to walk. But he only saw one pair to walk into. Cold, slender fingers would always gently support him and guide. A warm body he could always lean on to.

He looked up into the pair of grey eyes once again and whispered "Brother."


	2. Chapter 2

"Where do you think you are going?" He stopped dead on his tracks.

He turned around to meet a pair of grinning intense light brown eyes. A long face with short ash brown hair that was trimmed at the sides to a darker brown. Eren knew how exactly the horse face belonged to. He tightened his fist and drew his arm back, ready to aim a punch. "Jean! You shit face! You better clench your teeth tight because I am going to make your face half a size smaller for free."

Jean took a quick step to the left and patted Eren's back. "It was just a joke; you don't have to be such a pussy about everything. At least it wasn't the headmaster that you thought it was." He grabbed a handful of Eren's crop dark brown hair and ruffled it, narrowly missing Eren's blow. "You got some balls coming this late."

Eren tried yanking his head away but it made his hair roots hurt. "Get your dirty hands off Kirstein, before I reconstruct your face into something completely not recognizable." He held up 5 fingers, counting down. "5. 4. 3. 2-" He felt Jean loosening his grip and shoved him away. "Piss off."

"Looks like someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning and is currently having their period. I'll see you after you are done bleeding. Third lesson has already started." Jean shrugged and casually walked off. "I hoped you remembered about the history report that's due today." Jean popped his head out from the corner and pulled out a piece of paper with grids. He pointed to the second grid. "Good luck on your class."

"Fuck!" Eren cussed and did a jog towards his history class.

When he entered, he saw his blonde friend already seated down. Armin doing what he always had been doing, sticking his nose into a book. Armin was the all-time ace in the class, or even school. He was considered a genius for his age and it made people think whether he was the reincarnation of Albert Einstein. Or maybe his name was not Armin Arlert. But Armin Einstein.

He took a seat behind Armin and tapped his shoulder lightly. "Have you done the history report? God, why did I even bother to ask? Could you lend me your notes, please? Just your notes. Even a small glance at your notes would be fine too. I just need something to hand up, not an A+." Eren waited in anticipation for Amin's reply. Armin never rejected Eren at all in his life. They were childhood friends since way back and Eren would always stand up for Armin whenever he was in a pinch. Now it was Armin's turn to help.

"You know you are in deep shit right, coming this late. And I do not really mind lending you my notes Eren, but you know that Miss Hange is incredibly sharp at spotting who copied, who cheated and even who farted!" Armin leaned back and said.

"Come on! I will not copy word for word! I just need a small peak at your notes."

"That's what you said the last time-"

The doors of the classroom gave an eerie screech, as if to welcome the demon king from hell.

The class instantly dropped into dead silence and footsteps echoed throughout the class. The sound of a heavy book being slammed onto the desk not only broke the icy silence, but also the last string of hope that the students were holding onto. Miss Hange was an incredible woman, she was intellectual and had a way with words but only she had a few loose screws in her head. However, that did not stop her from brimming with passion and burning enthusiasm from teaching about historical events.

No one knew who could scare them more than Miss Hange's overly passionate speech every lesson, as well as her 'torture' methods for students who do not hand up work. There was just no one who was exceptionally crazier than her that could strike fear into their hearts.

No one, except the 160cm of wrath.

"Listen up you shit brats. Hange is on a medical leave for god knows how long and I'll be taking over her lessons until she is medically fit to resume teaching. In case you nutballs have slow processing brains, I will spell it out for you. This means that I'll be seeing you brats for three days a week for two hours. Don't worry; I hate it as much as you do. But as long as you are in my class, I will not tolerate smart-asses unless you think you are smarter than me. Nor will I tolerate uncleanliness or bullshit. That is all. Now turn your textbook to page 52 where she last stopped."

Eren pulled a book out to cover his face and leaned in to Armin. "Who is that midget with a temper as short as himself?"

"You better watch your tongue around him. He does have a short temper but he has rage a hundred times his size. He is Levi Ackerman, also known as Humanity's Strictest." Armin looked at Eren pitifully. "I can see your future with him, its blank. Do you know why? If you try any smart-ass remarks on him you will find yourself drowned in a sea of fury. He absolutely hates people who have a loud mouth, rebel and are untidy. Last time I checked, you fit the profile 101%."

"He probably hates them because he has to always look up at those people taller than him, especially when they are looking down at him." Eren sniggered.

"Eren, I want to make it out of this classroom alive and so from today on, let's not make unnecessary contact during history lessons. I want to keep my head intact to my neck." Armin turned back to the front and shifted his chair.

"Traitor." Eren muttered under his breathe and sank back into his seat. He could not take any more of the silence so he thudded his head loudly on his desk. He found himself immediately regretting his action as he felt eyes burning into him even though he was looking down.

"Yes, you. The assbite with the unruly hair. Do you have any problems? If you do you can get a free ticket out." He looked up and found himself starring across the class into the piercing eyes of the instructor. "Or you could also have another ticket to hell."

"N-no sir. I am completely, thoroughly, entirely happy with your class. No problems with it either." Eren stumbled over a few of his words.

Armin gave a sideways glance and placed his palm on his forehead.

"Good. Now you brats better hand out the report Hange gave or get your ass to my office after school. I'll teach you how to get shit done for those who do not know how."

A girl with chin-length black smooth hair looked back over her shoulder. "Idiot." she mouthed towards Eren.

By the time the lesson was over, Eren was reduced to a shattered mess. He stood up weakly and walked towards his friends who were waiting for him at the front of the class. "I told you, you should have done your homework. Armin and I did remind you a couple of times before the break but I guess you were too stupid it must have slipped out of your mind." Mikasa said as they headed to the cafeteria. "And what part of 'lesson starts at 8am' do you not understand?"

"Well I'm sorry," Eren snapped. "At least I was actually getting some shit done last night."

"Playing with yourself, is not equivalent to getting shit done."

"Mind your own business Mikasa."

Armin pretended he heard nothing and the trio went to sit at their usual spot. "You guys are late! So how was it like being under the demon's fangs?" Marco's brown eyes flashed with humor. Beside him, Jean was chuckling at the side of Eren glaring at the mentioning of the midget.

Sasha was stuffing her face hole with bunch of carbohydrates and choking. Historia was frantically giving her water and patting her back. Ymir just laid down on the bench, not giving a single fuck.

"I hope he gets stuck with you until you graduate." Jean laughed and wiped the tiny beads of tears that were forming in his eyes.

"Shut up and eat your food. You talk too much." Mikasa took a slice of bread from Sasha, earning her a groan of agony, and proceeded to shove the bread up Jean's mouth. He choked and cussed but everyone knew it was obvious he was delighted that Mikasa had just feed him. A tint of red could be seen creeping up his cheeks.

Eren pulled a face and made revolting noises.

He started to get lost in his own thoughts, something which he had been doing really often these days. It always takes him back to those times. Those times when they were with him. The pair of grey eyes, the arms and the body heat. Eren's head throbbed. No matter how hard he tried, he could always never remember how the face those eyes belonged to looked like.

He remembered the structured jaw, but he only had blurry images imprinted into his head.

The eyes, strong and full of will. Yet it always seemed to tone down gently when Eren's eyes met his. Eyes that sucks in, eyes that you can get lost in, eyes that hold the meaning of the world in. The eyes that Eren yearns for on him.

The arms, toned and lean, effortlessly lifting him up into their nest and embracing him warmly. Cold fingertips bushed lightly against his face, as if afraid to harm him, treating Eren like he was a fragile doll that could break the moment they gripped. He could still feel cool palms resting on his face. He wanted to bury his face in those palms forever.

The body heat was the most memorable thing to Eren. It was the most real feeling that Eren held on to. It was proof that they were real. It was also the only thing that kept Eren believing that they were still with him.

His brother.

He could no longer remember his face as the last him he saw his brother was when he was age 4. It has been many years since then and Eren's all grown. He wondered if he would ever see his dear brother again. He just wanted to see his face and call out his name. What's wrong with wanting that?

Once again, he tried his hardest to picture his brother's looks.

He pictured his brother's grey-metallic eyes, strong and sharp.

He pictured his brother's hair - short, straight and black styled in an undercut.

He pictured his brother's face structure, how his nose would look like, how his jaws would look like, his lips-

Unconsciously, he called out a name.

"Levi...”

Time seemed to have stopped as he snapped back to reality and noticed not seven, but eight pairs of eyes staring at him. And one of them belonged to a certain short man.

... A pair of metallic grey eyes. Eren's heart almost jumped out of his mouth while his brain was trying to process what was happening at the moment as well as trying to think up of an excuse to pardon his idiocy.

"What do you want, assface? At least have some decency to respect your elders and address them by their surname with a ‘Mr.’ not by their given name." Levi furrowed his eyebrows and never broke the eye contact he had with Eren. "Well? What's your excuse?"

"Sir, I can explain. I wasn't trying to call your name or anything it's just that I was thinking about a face and it just made me-"

"So you were thinking about my face?"

"No! Fuck n-! What I meant to say is that I was just thinking about where the gang and I could hang out after school. You know, at Levy's, a clothing store. I had difficulty pronouncing that word so I was thinking of different ways to pronounce it. But I didn't know I called out your name... SIR!" Eren felt like his brain was going to burst because of him fabricating really bad lies.

Levi seemed to have digested the lie and Eren could not read the expression he was showing. All he knew was that he, himself, was perspiring profusely even though they we in an air-conditioned cafeteria and he will never see the end of it with his friends' constant teasing about this matter. Oh his youth.

"Looks like you really need some special lessons from me. Lessons about how to get work done, how to have respect for your elders and as well as how to spin better lies. But I'll take that lie for now. What's your name?"

"Eren. Eren Yeager."

"Well Eren Yeager, see you after school in my office."

"Yes sir."

He was left with his goofy friends who were trying so hard to hold back their laughter. Even Ymir seemed to have cared for anything else other than Historia for once.

"You are screw Yeager, so screwed." Jean was grinning from ear to ear and he rested his arm on Eren's shoulder.

Eren did not have any smart comebacks to say.


	3. Chapter 3

He heard a soft knock on the door and looked up from his desk buried in paper work. Levi put down his pen from marking the class's history report. It was a load of crap, except from two people, Armin Arlert and Mikasa Ackerman. That was what he expected from his own niece. No one probably noticed it yet either, it was a pain in the ass to deal with family matters in school.

He thought about the Yeager kid outside, probably pissing his pants, a new face he had never seen before although he knew that Eren was one of Mikasa's childhood friends other than Armin Arlert. However, he did find that kid amusing and somehow hard to hate.

To his annoyance, he also found him adorable, strangely adorable.

What was he even thinking; he was twice the kid's age. The brat probably never even had his first kiss yet. Eren would actually be appealing if he kept his mouth shut most of the time. Levi decided that he had made Eren waited long enough outside before calling him in. "Come in."

He saw the brunette peeking in nonchalantly, even though he was half expecting Eren to be dreading over the thought of having a one to one with him. But he looked calm and collected, or other words, he looked like he was actually thinking really hard, eyebrows furrowed.

"Are you going to walk in or do I have to personally stand up to welcome you." Levi drummed his fingers impatiently on his desk, making soft and inaudible sounds.

Eren sat on the chair in front of Levi awkwardly and looked around the office furnished to Levi's taste. It spoke a lot about his personality - clean, neat and organized. He was now afraid of leaving his finger prints on anything or dirtying the cushioned chair he was sitting on. He remembered Armin's words. 'Whatever you do, just do not stain, break or-- forget it. Just do not touch anything.'

Levi opened his drawer and took out a stack of worksheets for Eren. "Here," he said as he dropped the thick heap of papers in front of Eren. "Get this whole pile completed by today. This is all topics that you have learned before in Hange's class. You are expected to have a passing rate of 100%. If you did pay attention in class or have been doing your reports regularly, this would be a piece of cake."

"But sir! It is just impossible to finish all of this by today, what if I am unable to?" Eren thought that it was simply impossible to finish all that shit in one day. He could not even finish one piece of worksheet in one week, what made him think that he could finish a hundred times that in just one day.

"If you can't finish it by today then you will have to just spend the night in school until you have finished everything. I don't care how long it takes but when I say that you will learn how to complete your work on time, you better do it shitty brat." Levi brought a cup to his mouth and sipped his drink.

Eren gave a look of desperation and defeat. He looked at Levi who was now occupied by marking and penning down remarks on pieces of scripts, wondering if he could sneak out without him noticing. That was undeniably impossible. How could he even think he had chances to escape without notifying Levi was just right in front of him?

"Don't even think about leaving. Until you complete one set, you will be allowed to leave for 10 minutes." Levi said without even looking up at Eren.

What other choice did he have now? He could only complete one and then get the 10 minutes break to look for Armin and asked him to help make a little cheat sheet that he could use for. Staying overnight in school would be too much to handle; especially being alone with Levi in this room is already suffocating. It has only been 15 whole minutes and he could not think about spending his night here.

He whipped out a pen and starting ferociously pumping his brain for answers. Many of the topics he had long forgotten but he had a vague idea of what it was about. He looked at the clock on the wall behind Levi. It was already 5pm, and Armin usually got off the campus around 5.30pm after his extra lessons for a third language.

He rushed through the paper and prayed that he would be done in time before Armin left.

Levi looked up from his papers full of his red markings to find Eren actually seriously doing work. He had a face full of determination and Levi actually felt something stirred in him. But he wrote it off as just being in a room with a repulsive brat made him feel all weird and prickly inside.

The next time Eren looked at the clock, he had already completed most of the question from the first set of papers and he was feeling proud that he was able to answer most of the questions. The time read 5.45pm as he placed his pen down and passed his paper to Levi. "Here you go, I have finished. May I excuse myself?"

Levi's cold fingers brushed against Eren's and Eren could feel himself shudder at his touch. His fingers had a strange sensation and he felt tingly all over. The cool tips of Levi's fingers tapped on Eren's hands. "Hello? Let go."

Eren immediately drew back his hands but he could feel his own face turning hot up to his ears. He merely met Levi's skin for a few seconds but he felt like time stopped at that exact moment. He missed the feeling of the cool skin upon his and he yearned for more skin contact.

Hearing his heart thumping at his ears, he could barely make out what Levi was saying. "You may go now, come back in 10 minutes. Your 10 minutes starts now. Scoot."

Getting up, Eren bolted for the door and left in just a split second. Back inside, Levi was left alone and he finally let his guard down. He could burn a hole in his fingers just by starring at them intensely. "What was that about?" He talked to no one in particular.

Outside, Eren was running towards Armin's class, hoping that he was still there. But in his head, all of his thoughts were just full of a face, cold fingers and a name. He could not believe it. How could Levi possess them? How could he have his brother's eyes and hands?

Coming into contact with Levi's fingers made him think that he was back in those days again where his brother would always caress his face gently with his pair of hands, his cold touch lingering around his skin.

Eren pushed all those thoughts out of his head as he spotted Amin’s striking straw head. He did a slow trot over to Armin’s side. He had a lot of thoughts his in head, but it did not distract him from his original purpose.

“Hey Armin, I would like to ask you to lend me some notes that you took from the history lessons this year.” He asked and noticed that the area around Armin’s eyes looked red and swollen; like he had been crying.

 “Oh Eren,” Armin saw the startled expression on Eren’s face and covered his swelling eyes, bringing a hand across his cheeks to wipe the dried tears. “Sure, but why do you need them for?” His voice was shaking a little, like he was still emotionally unstable. 

“Ah- I need them for the pile of work that the demon has given me to do. I must have it completed by today or I won’t be able to leave the premises.” Eren was a little worried about the condition Armin was in. He was curious but he respect Armin’s decision of not saying anything.

Armin took out a handful of notes out of his bag and held it out towards Eren. “Here you go; I’m running late meeting with my friends now. I just came back to class because I had forgotten to take my wallet.” He turned the other way but Eren could catch a few glimpses of tears threatening to fall.

“Armin!”

“Don’t worry about me.” Eren could hear the pain in his voice. “Just a tip for you Eren, you will only appreciate how important something else when they have left. So cherish it. You should also grab onto it while you still can.”

Those words made Eren’s heartache.

He had already been through one. That’s when he suddenly remembered about Levi. Eren thought that he, himself, must be utterly mad to think about Levi in a situation like this. That is when he realized that Levi must be someone who was special to him.  

“… Thank you, Armin!” Eren ran back to the office, to Levi.

 

 

 

“I’m sorry Armin, but you know that I can’t return your feelings. I’ve told you before; I do have someone else I like.” Jean said in a gentle voice. The young boy in front of him was trying his best to control the tears hanging heavily and loosely in his eyes. His heart felt heavy and he felt like he was going to choke on the ball of feelings stuck in his throat.

Armin had always known that Jean had a crush on someone else but him. But he still took all the courage in him to confess to the love of his love today. And it totally sucked bull. He knew that first loves are already unrequited.

“No, stop.” Jean wanted to give Armin a soft hug to comfort him but was rejected coldly. “Stop being so nice to me. Stop giving me hope like this.” He was trembling in his voice, and it hurt Jean to see his best friend like this.

“Just leave me alone, please. I’ll follow be right behind you guys after I have calmed down a little. Just give me some time, alright?” Armin pleaded. It was actually a lie. He wanted Jean to leave him be and just cry himself to sleep in one corner.

It was his first time suffering from a broken love and it felt like his heart was torn into two. He wondered if he could actually die from the pain.

“Alright, I’ll tell the others that you were called out by a teacher. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” Jean walked out the classroom, closing the door silently behind him.

What seemed like hours of rotting inside the classroom all alone crying, Armin decided to walk out and take a breath of air. He heard a sound of feet running down the hallway and found himself looking into the eyes of Eren Yeager.

“Hey Armin, I would like to ask you to lend me some notes that you took from the history lessons this year.” Eren panted.

They finally stopped talking and Armin was laughing at his own ridiculous speech he told Eren.

He liked Eren as his friend, but he could find himself hating Eren some times. Why was he born not as tall as Eren, not as charming and charismatic as Eren, not as popular as Eren? Now he found another reason to hate Eren secretly even more.

His childhood friend had stolen the guy he liked the most. Yes, the person that Jean Kirstein liked was Eren Yeager. But all Eren thought of, was his imaginary ‘brother’. He never once heard that Eren had a blood sibling. It seemed like some stupidity that was all inside Eren’s head.

Jean was always looking at Eren and when Eren was not around; Jean would always talk about Eren. He cared for Eren more than anything else in the word. How could be so blind that he could not see the jewels around him. The speech he said to Eren was indirectly informing him about Jean.

But Eren looked like he had become conscious of something.

Armin decided to not get involve in anymore of the affairs between Jean and Eren.

 

 

 

The door bolted open with a loud and forceful action that disturbed Levi from his short nap on the leather couch. He frowned and wondered who was daring enough to interrupt his time alone. Looking up, he saw the cheeky face of Eren Jaeger, of course. 

“I have something to say sir!”  Eren was slightly drenched in sweat and he was breathing heavily. It looked like as if he had ran a marathon.

“It better be important.” Levi stared daggers at Eren who flinched slightly. Eren was not sure if his matter was worth mentioning at all but Armin’s words were deeply imprinted in his head.

“Could you please touch me?” Eren croaked out. It sounded better when he heard it in his head.

“Huh?” He raised an eyebrow, confused. “What did you just say, brat?” His eyes had lost their glare and were replaced by a look of bewilderment.

Eren realized how dirty it actually sounded and started to correct himself. “I swear it’s not what you are thinking right now!”

“Then enlighten me, what is it that you want.”

“I just thought that your hands felt awfully familiar. It reminds me of someone who was important to me in the past. That person still is though.”

“My hands?” Levi suddenly knew why Eren retracted his hands when their skin collided. The look of surprise and the small blush that crept up his cheeks suddenly made a lot of sense.

“Yes…” Eren could feel himself reddening up and the room seemed a lot stuffier than it already was. “I had a brother when I was young, I don’t remember much about him but I remember the color of his eyes.”

“His eyes were just like yours, though I bet he was a lot kinder than you are.” Eren felt himself opening up a little towards him. Levi was just sitting there, taking all the insanity of Eren without batting an eyelid. He was just listening to his story.

Eren felt thankful for that. He was a little touched by the consideration Levi was giving him.

“… Would you touch me once more?” Eren faintly asked. He felt embarrassed to the core. There were limits to everything. There was also a limit to asking a teacher things, especially when the teacher is none other than Levi Ackerman. 

Levi sealed his lips tightly. The fact that he was actually taking this into consideration was proof that he was just as insane as the kid was. “Are you asking me to be your brother for you? Or at least act like his substitute.” He thought for a moment and said. “You sure have balls the size of a plant to even ask this from me.”

Eren was not sure whether he was actually looking for a substitute to confide his feelings in. But all he knew that Levi definitely fitted the bill. It also did not feel right to substitute his brother. His brother’s existence is precious to him and he would never let anyone else take the position.

“… You are not a substitute…” Eren hated the sound of that word.

“Then what am I to you?” Levi could not help but actually be jealous of the brat’s brother. He was also curious to know what Yeager thought about him.

“I don’t know.” Yeager hang his head low and Levi could not help but place his cool hands on the brat’s soft cheeks. Eren looked shocked and stiffened but he instantaneously relaxed. He was not expecting the same look in Levi’s eyes.

The same gentle and warm look his brother gave.

“Alright,” Levi removed his hand and his expression changed back to normal in a split second. “But this ends whenever I say it will end.” He invited Eren to sit beside him. “Specifically tell me where do you want me to touch you.”

“I always enjoy a hand on my head...” He said shyly and brought his knees to his chest. Sitting beside Levi was nerve-wrecking because he could feel Levi’s warmth up-close.

Eren was alarmed by the sudden action Levi did which brought his face down on a pair of toned thighs. “Wuah!” He could feel fingers running through his hair, lightly caressing his head.

“What, you can’t expect me to do that when you are actually upright. Be grateful, you are laying on the finest lap in history.” Levi had a really bad sense of humor but it made Eren happy. “Brat. 

Levi spoke to him in a soft voice. Eren could not see the expression on Levi’s face but he wondered how Levi was actually feeling about him.

He closed his eyes, enjoying the moment. It had been years since he last felt like this.

 “You are allowed to sleep, for now. However you are expected to continue with the assignments I just gave you the moment you awake.”

 

 

 

 

It had been 4 months since the both of them started having their private time together after school, the same routine of lying on Levi’s lap; having Levi play with his hair, feeling his cool palms on his face, the sensation when his fingers roam across his skin. And occasionally some sweet talk.

“Levi,” Eren was now used to calling him by his name when they were alone together; Levi did not seem to mind. Eren liked the way Levi’s name rolled off his tongue; Levi liked the way Eren said his name.

“Yeah?” Levi stroked Eren at the back of his head. It was now something that he was used to doing.

“What am I to you?”

“…”

Eren wanted to know desperately. He needed an answer from him. He was currently confused and he did not know what to do; Jean had confessed to him a few days back. It looked like as if Armin had known about it for a long time when he went to find him for advice. Although Armin never had offered him any, instead, he looked like has was bitter about something.

He did not know why but Levi was the first person that came into his mind when Jean asked if he was interested in anyone.

He could not have possibly fallen for Levi, did he? What they were doing actually had nothing to do with love. It was just a request from Eren and Levi had accepted it because of what Eren thought as pity. Their physical contact was something only Eren was yearning for.

Eren’s heart pounded loudly against his ribcage as he waited in apprehension for Levi’s answer.

Levi stopped stroking his hair and seemed to have gone into deep thoughts. Eren was getting a little scared. He suddenly did not want to know his answer. Maybe if no feelings were being involved, he would not get hurt.

He did not want to lose another precious person. It seemed like Levi only treated him like a student. If Eren was harboring feelings for him that was more than a teacher, it would hurt him a lot when Levi replied him

“I-.”

“No, don’t. Stop.” Eren abruptly interrupted into Levi’s sentence. “Don’t tell me, I was just caught up in the moment.” He smiled. It would be better if he did not know.

Eren was leaning onto Levi’s shoulder when Levi got up and he fell onto the couch.

“Levi?” Did he do something to anger him?

“I think it would be better if we had some time apart.” Levi finally said

Eren felt a sharp pain in this chest. So this is what it was, the thing that Eren was fiercely trying to deny and hide.

He was already in love with his own teacher.

 

 

 

 

“Watch where you are going, Eren! In front of you!” Jean could not hold on to Eren in time.

“What?”

Eren felt a bump on his chest and looked down to find a very angry looking teacher.

“I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t see where I was going.” Eren got flustered and waved his arms around. He was feeling feverish and was on his way to the infirmary with Jean tagging along in case he got dizzy.

“Step aside.” Levi frowned and walked past, ignoring Eren’s futile attempts to explain himself. He was exactly not pissed at Eren, but seeing Jean with him somehow made him feel irritated. He was the one who initiated that they need some time apart. It had been 3 weeks since they last spoken.

“What’s his problem…?” Jean muttered to Eren and held Eren at his waist. “Come on; let’s get you in the infirmary bed.”

“Thank you, Jean.”

Jean raised an eyebrow at Eren’s weirdness. “What for?”

“For being right with me.”

“… If you really want to thank me for that, I would appreciate it if you would give me my reply towards my confession.”

“Not now Jean, now it’s not really the right time.”

“I know, geez, I was just saying.”

They walked through the first floor and finally reached the infirmary. Jean delicately placed Eren onto the clear sheets and placed a hand on his forehead. “Your temperature is getting pretty bad. Your eyes bags are also getting darker. Have you been sleeping well?”

Eren turned to his side, away from Jean. “Not really. I can’t seem to sleep well for the past weeks.”

“Did something happen between you and Mr. Ackerman? The both of you seemed weird for the past weeks, even though you were pretty close before.” There was a warning in Jean’s brain that was telling him to stop digging in.

“No, It’s just,” Eren felt the words bouncing off his tongue like poison. “A normal student-teacher relationship. You are over-thinking it.”

“I wish that was the case.” Jean said and he immediately wanted to put those words back into his mouth. It was like as if he was saying that he was suspicious of the relationship between Eren and Levi.

“You are sick.” Eren meant it in an insulting way.

“Yeah, I’m so in love with you that it’s driving me nuts. I can’t help but nitpick at everything that is about you.” Jean wanted to say it in a joking manner but it came out as his true feelings. He received no reaction from Eren. He did not know if Eren really ignored him or he just went to sleep.

Fuck; He thought. He could not even tell what was on Eren’s mind although he loved him into bits. Who said that love was sweet nectar that you cannot get enough of? He wanted to murder the person who invented that it was. Love was as bitter and painful all the time to him. It was like he was being stabbed in the heart everything he felt jealousy.

It must have been what Armin had felt.  

Now it was his turn; his retribution for hurting Armin.

Jean walked out of the infirmary and closed the door silently behind him.

Outside, he noticed a certain blonde hair guy watching him with his blue eyes. “How is Eren doing?”

“Not so good, it seems like he did not really put much food into his mouth too.” Jean walked up towards Armin who was leaning on the side of a wall.

“I heard from Eren that you had confessed to him a few weeks back. He came to me and asked me what he should do.”

“Is there something you want to say?” Jean was puzzled the fact that Armin was actually trying to strike a conversation with him. Since the last time that he had rejected him, they did not make much contact unless needed.

Armin looked down at his feet and spoke almost inaudibly. “I told him to follow whatever he thinks is right. And this few weeks I kept seeing you guys together so I thought…”

“Things didn’t actually go well for me. It seemed like Eren actually does have someone he likes.” Jean slumped down and crouched.

“Who?” Armin was rather surprised. Eren never spoke much about love and all. He did not think that he would actually be capable of liking someone.

“It seemed to me like it’s the history teacher.”

 

 

 

 

Eren heard the door shut behind him and figured that Jean and left. He missed Levi badly. He wanted those eyes upon him, those fingers touching his skin again. He wanted to hear Levi’s voice in his ear. He was missing him so dreadfully that it started to have a toll on him.

He could not sleep at night for the past weeks that Levi had not contacted him. Perhaps it was actually his own fault. Why did he even asked what did Levi actually thought about him. He knew very well about the line between them.

The line that he must not crossed. But all it took was just one sentence that destroyed everything. He had over stepped his boundaries and it cost him something he valued.

He also had misconceived the fact that Levi is not like his brother. They were both just very different. One was someone he looked look up to, and another, was someone he loved.

He got them mixed up and now he lost both of them. The Levi who reminded Eren of his brother.

And the Levi who Eren had fallen hard for; whether be it the Levi who was always hushed on him, feared by people, called the 160cm of wrath.  He loved them all.

Now he had lost both of them.

He heard the door slide open softly. Thinking that it was Jean who came back, he closed his eyes pretended to sleep.

“Hey, brat.”

Eren held his breathe. Now he lied as still as he could, he did not even dare to move a muscle. He felt something cool touching his forehead.

“You look like shit. Have you not been sleeping enough?”

Thank you; Eren thought; even though Levi had been the reason why he was missing out on sleep so much.

“Well looks like you don’t need me anymore, having that assface hanging all over you. Have fun with your new toy.” Levi said sarcastically and left the infirmary in a huff.

Eren could feel his tears threatening to form. What the fuck was that. Was that all he could say?

Fine.

Then maybe he would just be happier with Jean.


End file.
